BREAKING NEWS: 5 bomb blasts and still no casualties!!!

News- “Another bomb blast rocks Pune”
Our reaction- “Hmm!”
News-“No one died. Few injured mildly.”
Our reaction- “Oh my fucking God!”

What is happening to our country! No one dead. It seems we are losing our tradition of high death toll during blasts. Ever since the 1993, more people have died in India due to blasts than anywhere else in the world. And we are proud to say that. After all we are number one for once. No one, not even the first world countries, can ever think of coming near to us in this field, ever. And we show all our pride by spending crores on the ‘heros’ who have tried to maintain this track record of ours.

We are accustomed to a bomb or gunman comes along and shakes our faith in the idea of ‘normalcy’. And we have taken so much time and pain to absorb this. Yesterday 5 blasts took place and 1 was diffused. How can our Government let such a thing happen? How can it diffuse the last bomb? May be that was the bomb that was to shake us again, bringing back the happy memories of blasts and give news channels field of the day. How can the Government be so careless? But maybe it was not!

People are saying that this was not the act of any terrorist group. And I tend to agree with them. Had it been some terrorist group, there would have been a lot of casualties. These terrorist groups have got more practice than our athletes competing in the Olympics.

Congress might be behind this. And if this is true, then who the hell gave them right to break the trend of deaths after blast! They had no right to keep people from mourning for one hour and then go back to their routine.

It might be the work of congress just to divert the attention of the people from the Anna Hazare campaign, that's why the bombs are low intensity bombs. But what’s the use of this? Govt. could have easily fooled the public again and saved this shame of zero casualty. After all we want to be bombed and bled over and over again.

And if the Congress is not behind this, then there are two possibilities: The first is that new kids are emerging because the old ones have lost their vibe. The second one is that the old pros are testing new toys. If this is the case then it is good news. This means that India has not lost its position and is still the “golden bird” that the world wants to kill.

On a more serious note it must be pointed out that we as a society are all victims of bomb blasts. We may display an indifference to what is happening around us and this could be interpreted that having become desensitized to bomb blasts. This occurs at a superficial level. Some might consider this as a coping strategy, but nevertheless as a result, we have not adopted the necessary steps to address this very serious problem. At a deeper level, we as individuals and a society as a whole are being very seriously affected, not only in terms of loss of life and property but psychologically as well.

We have to ensure that we don’t become such people who have more ‘spirit’ but are just becoming more thick-skinned as a people.

The next president: Do we want another smut like Pratibha Patil?

Have you all ever thought how the whole world thinks about who the president of our republic is? I am sure even the Pakistanis would also be rolling on the floor laughing, seeing what we have for a president, even though they have someone called Zardari to their credit.

We have given a weak and foolish face to our great defense forces. She has done no justice to the honourable chair which she has unfortunately occupied for the last five years.

 “Shouldn’t a President be entitled to even 260,000-square-feet post-retirement home (including building and fenced land)?” This was a poser from President Pratibha Patil’s son Rajendra Shekhawat.

The following are a few other extracts from IBN Live —

•  Pratibha Patil’s brother G N Patil had been charged with murdering a politician whose professor wife then accused Pratibha Patil of shielding the killer.

• Pratibha has spent Rs 205 crores on lavish overseas travels during her Presidency so far. This is the highest for any President.

What a poor replacement for missile man Dr Abdul Kalam, who is respected worldwide.

Do you realize how big a hole she has punctured into the exchequer just by her irritable flying habits? Ever? Once in last five years? While she is not even worthy enough to fly with one support staff, her regularly holiday around the globe with at least 90 of them, which includes 6 chefs, 2 bottlers, 4 housekeeping staffs and I don’t want to believe this one, one masseuse.

And by the way our madam President has just recently signed an enquiry privilege letter to ask our Apex court to come transparent on their 2G ruling so that people whom she cooked for four decades can have their priorities safeguarded. As a piece of questionnaire – Does she really understand what a privilege letter is all about or she just signs on anything that her masters order her to?

President of India grants mercy to convicts who raped pregnant woman and butchered her family. In the past 5 years she has commuted 35 death sentences to life imprisonments.

How long will Indians continue to tolerate corrupt, inefficient and greedy leaders? The president of India is the face of our nation to the world. Do we want a feeble, tainted and an incompetent slime as the head of the country? 

Now we really hope that a non political president like APJ Abdul Kalam or Narayana Murthy can only do some justice to this office which has become a laugh appointment.

YEDDY’S SEX SCANDEL!!!

 

 

Yeddy was involved in illegal sexual activity in jail and is now pregnant! 

Even he is shocked. That’s why he is complaining of chest pain! But the real reason for his admission in hospital is not the chest pain. Trusted sources have revealed the real problem.

He was admitted to the ICU of Jayadeva Hospital yesterday. He had high blood pressure and vomited a couple of times at about 0145 hrs, which prompted the jail authorities to rush him to hospital, sources said, adding his condition is stated to be stable.

Rumors are Mr. Advani was seen rushing out of the jail cell few minutes before Yeddi was found unconscious, naked and bloody! He was immediately given first aid and fluid (later identified as semen) on his body was wiped away. When Mr. Yeddi came around he was shocked to see himself in such condition. But before he could say a word he vomited twice. And when he tried to walk doctors saw his ass had swollen and he was not even able to walk properly.

The doctors tried to ask him what happened but he was reluctant to answer first but after some time he admitted his sexual relationship with Advani. He also said that Advani came only to talk. But the cell was small and they were sitting quite close. So the atmosphere got so intense and one thing led to another.

While talking he vomited again. Fearing ‘something’ he immediately asked for a pregnancy test strip and his worst fears came true! He lost his cool and right away called Mr. Advani.
A man heard their conversation. It went on like this “How could you do this to me” *pause* “But you said you’d use protection” *pause* “Now what!” *long pause* “So it’s over?”   

It seems that Advani and Yeddi have now broken up.

It was widely known that Advani had a soft corner for Yddi but no one in their wildest dreams could ever imagine something like this! But as they say love has no age!
Although this raises one more even more debatable question “How the hell could Advani get an hard-on in this age!”

For now Mr. Yeddi is in hospital on pretext of heart attack. What will happen to the child? Maybe he’s planning to have abortion done or give up his child for adoption. Only time will tell.

NEXT CHOICE AS PRIME MINISTER- MAYAWATI

Yes. My next choice is definitely MAYAWATI!!!

People who criticize her are missing the most important point. It is not as if Mayawati has done anything new. Every political leader in India is guilty of extravagant expenditure where it is not necessary at all.

Bottom-line is that she has invested on something for the entertainment of people (even though it is a very ‘dalit’ type)!  She has made a 700 Crore park this time. Who knows what she will make if she becomes the PM! Maybe a modern and hi-tech APPU-GHAR or an Indian version of Disney land! We can definitely do with one!

No one has ever undertaken any project so beneficial to citizens. India builds its useful otiose longest railway tunnel for 391 crores. This tunnel in all manners is a proud futile project that will unite divide India even more and strengthen weaken Indian defense. Imagine wasting such a huge amount of money in such unserviceable things!

 

Who the hell needs defense? The need of the hour is to make such economical parks with the sorcerous statues of Mayawati. These alone are sufficient to scare the shit out of the Chinese! I would be if I see them in my dreams!

So, let us not point fingers at Mayawati now. We should encourage her to deploy more statues at the border. 6 crore a statue is nothing when the national security comes. For the Chinese missiles we have Mayawati on her dangerous elephants! The dalit waste warrior of India!

On a serious note one thing for sure is we can’t do anything about it now! The only consolation we can give ourselves is that the hard earned money of people has been utilized in developing a park that will change the face of U.P!

Please someone flush this stinking piece of shit.  

LAST TIME IT WAS BABRI MASJID, WHAT WILL HE BREAK THIS TIME!

THE “YATRI” OF INDIA!

The old dog is not ready to quit yet! Advani​, high on 83, refusing to retire and still desperately seeking the PM’s chair, has started yet another rath yatra, although this time aimed at “good governance and clean politics”. The proclamation signaled bad omen for a lot of people in the party. It was all the more deadly because barring the viciously polarizing rath yatra preceding the Babri Masjid demolition, all his four rath yatras later have been superb box office flops. Besides, as BJP’s PM candidate in the 2009 polls, he led his party to a resounding defeat. 

Advani, who led his Hindu ultra nationalist party, BJP, to power on the wave of the cry to build a 'Ram Temple' at the site of the Babri Masjid and personally oversaw its demolition on 6 December 1992. 

Whereas in the 1980s, he promised “Ram Rajya” if the BJP came to power, his slogan today is the rather more secular promise of “good governance” and “clean politics”.

The yatra is being called "Jan Chetna yatra". Great, so Advaniji wants to tell the people that corruption is happening (in government by Congress) and people should vote BJP next time. It sounds like Advaniji is breaking this news to the people of this country! If he and his yatra is so serious about corruption than why he is not talking technically on how they will root out the corruption. We would like to hear the minute details of the project!

First thing we want to know is where the money for this Yarta is coming for. How much money have they spent and the sources as well. Secondly if they are spending more money, is it really worth or is it just a move for publicity that they want to use in coming elections.

In 1990s he broke the Barbri Masjid. Maybe this time he plans to break the record of longest rath yatra ever taken by a politician in scorching heat inside an air conditioned vehicle. This definitely shows that we need someone like him to understand the woes of nation by traveling nationwide on public expense!

DON’T GIVE HIM DEATH; HE WAS FUCKING BRAINWASHED LIKE A ROBOT!

Such a plea given by Kasab in court seems to be advised by the councilor of Kasab who is not only playing with the court but also making a big ‘Chutiya’ of 1,155,347,700 Indians.

The human right activists say “He is human and should not be killed. By killing him nothing will be achieved. He should be given life imprisonment and detained in India for what he has done." Fuck you all imbeciles. These fucking dickheads hide their despicable heads when peaceful protestors like Anna Hazare are arrested and start to twaddle about the right of some inhuman terrorists! Suckers!

The only reason why Kasab should have been kept alive was that he is the only evidence that ties the role of Pakistani establishment to 26/11. If he was gone, Pakistan would have dragged the case for eternity asking for more evidence (which it is anyways doing now!).
With America dragging itself away from 26/11 by delaying truth about Headley, Kasab was the only trump card India could have used against Pakistan.
But since Pakistan has again shown that he is a fucking asshole and will not mend its ways there is reason at all to feed this bloody bastard our parent’s hard earned money!

I will soon be a tax payer and so will be you all. If it takes another 10 years to hang Kasab then our Government will spend around Rs350 crore on his security, fooding and medical expenses. So I have to now mentally prepare that Government is going to get extra tax from my pocket from today till Kasab get hanged. And for what? To get my freaking head blown off someday by some other son of a bitch just like him!

MY SOLUTION:- Since our government comprises of all kind of old impotent arses, let’s pool in money, hire a contract killer & get this motherfucking Kasab killed before he eats up our money in high-profile security & biryani!

I somehow remembered Saudi Arabia which media and people say has a very harsh and cruel judiciary system. But they tend to overlook some good points. If they are bad then they are bad for all. They don’t differentiate between a Pakistani Muslim and an Indian Muslim nor do they differentiate between them and a non-Muslim. Point is they are and they have been consistent.

TO OUR GOVERNMENT:-
SHOW SOME FUCKING BALLS! DON’T PORTRAY US INFRONT OF THE WORLD AS IMPOTENT COWARDS WHO CAN’T EVEN GIVE THE DESERVED PUNISHMENT TO SOME COLD-BLODDED KILLER!

OUR INCOMPETENT POLITICIANS!

Another day, another blast, many more lives lost, another day of constant bickering on TV, another day for indignation and hopelessness. Where exactly are we going wrong in our war against terror?

What we hear #1: We strongly condemn the attacks.
Substitute with: We're tired of condemning attacks; if we don't come back to you with the justice that you, as citizens of this country, deserve after trusting us to protect you, we'll add another amendment to our constitution that makes it legally possible for you to remove the expensive security that we're granted with your hard-earned money every time we use the word 'condemn' after an attack.

What we hear #2: It is a cowardly act.
Substitute with: How do we know it's a cowardly attack? Because it takes one to know one.

What we hear #3: We will not succumb to terrorism.
Substitute with: We will make good on our promises and strengthen preemptive measures that will allow us to stop terror in its tracks and not subject you to the same old rinse-repeat routine you've been hearing from us for we don't know how long.

What we hear #4: This was a planned attack.
Substitute with: Instead of exchanging flirtatious couplets in a parliament session with opposition parties, we will actually plan and debate on what steps we need to take to strengthen security.

What we hear #5: We'd warned the (affected) state government of possible terror attacks.
Substitute with: We'll not try to wash our hands off what is essentially our collective responsibility and add insult to your injury. We'll consider such meaningless utterances a punishable crime henceforth.

What we hear #6: The government pledges X lakhs of rupees for bereaved families.
Substitute with: We will stop this cowardly act of putting a price on innocent lives lost for no fault of theirs. Instead, we'll establish a welfare fund for families affected by terror attacks that will be transparent and will support the families for as long as they need.

What we hear #7: There are no leads yet.
Substitute with: You know someone will 'claim' responsibility, right? We'll tell you when they do.

What we hear #8: We can't fight terror alone.
Substitute with: We can't fight terror. Period. Let's make way for those who can.

What we hear # 9: The perpetrators will be brought to book.
Substitute with: The perpetrators will be caught and will be accorded capital punishment. We will expedite capital punishment to convicted terrorists as a deterrent and to demonstrate zero tolerance to threats to National Security.

Any more you can think of????